Who Said It? The Office Edition

6.7K Shares

Do you utter "that's what she said" at anything that remotely resembles sexual innuendo? Do you high five a friend from across the room? Do you point out which of the people in your office are a Stanley, which are a Phyllis, and which are, yikes, a Meredith to your co-workers?

Then this quiz is for you! It's hard to believe it's been FOUR years since The Office took its final bow in spring of 2013 on NBC. Now most of us go to Netflix to get our fix of the series, disappearing for days at a time for multiple-season binge. And sure, "Jim and Pam" are household names, and everybody knows Steve Carell and his alter-ego Michael Scott, but watching the character arcs (or lack thereof) of the "Kelly and Ryan" or Creed Bratton as, well, Creed Bratton (yes that's the name of actor AND character) is just as exciting for the true fans. All this from a British export that only has a six episode arc in its first season.

It would have been easy just to pull direct address quotes from the confessional style response to the action to make you laugh, but we included some plot driven ones here too just to mix it up. And be careful, sometimes the images don't line up with the correct choice, and while we tried to dig deep in the character cannon, once in a while, to mix it up, we will return to a person who we already quoted questions before!

Hope you win the gold yogurt lid!

Question 1

"I love fake boobs. Often times, you find them on strippers."

This character was known for their offensive work-place comments, but in The Office, sadly for you, that could mean a lot of people. This particular conversation is sparked when boss Michael Scott's ex-girlfriend, Jan, gets a "boob job" and various employees of Dunder Mifflin weigh in on how they feel about it. Regardless of their opinions, it seems to work for Michael, as he decides to get back together with her. This finale of Season 3 is titled "The Job."

Question 2

"I'm petrified of nipple chafing. Once it starts it is a vicious circle."

We guess people's chests are a frequent topic of conversation at Dunder Mifflin, but in this case its on an entirely different topic, an upcoming charity run on behalf of employee Meredith Baxter in the Season 4 opener, "Michael Scott's Dunder Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure." This, after the boss hits Meredith with his car, only to discover she has rabies. While some workers bow out to go to a restaurant, a special few take the run VERY seriously.

Question 3

"And just as you have planted your seed in the ground, I'm going to plant my seed in you."

In Season 3, Episode 5, titled "Initiation", with Jim working now at the Stamford branch, having requested a transfer after being rejected by Pam, it's temp Ryan's chance to make his first sales call, and this Office salesman has been appointed to mentor him in doing so. The rest of the Dunder Mifflin team is distracted by pretzel day, causing Michael, after ordering one with 18 types of sugary toppings, to go on a hyperactive rant before falling asleep at this desk.

Question 4

"AIDS is not funny. Believe me, I have tried."

In this season 2 closer, Casino Night, Michael ends up with two dates to his office fundraiser, Jan and Carol, and Dwight, of course, insists he be in charge of keeping them away from each other. Inter-office romance abounds, as Dwight sneaks a kiss on the cheek with Angela, Jim confronts Ryan about if he is in a relationship with Kelly, and, of course, the night ends with Jim kissing Pam for the first time. All this, while amateur Phyllis takes down near pro Kevin in poker.

Question 5

"Ultimatums are key. Basically nobody does anything for me anymore unless I threaten to kill myself."

It's perhaps no surprise that this great, edgy, and very funny line was served up in Season 7, Episode 11 for this character, as it was actually written by the actor playing the role. When Michael discovers old flame Holly is visiting the Scranton branch of Dunder Mifflin, he orders the party planning committee to create a "Classy Christmas", only to sink into depression when he discovers she has a boyfriend. This response comes when Holly reveals the hopeful news that she is impatiently waiting on said boyfriend to propose, and wants to issue an ultimatum.

Question 6

"Somebody had the balls to put my phone number on the men's room wall. Which is so messed up. It's 6782 not 83."

While this quote is from Season 9, Episode 14 of The Office, titled "Vandalism", the final year of the show, it could easily have been from Season 1, Episode 1. That's because some characters don't change their stripes, and this particular person was given amazing one-liners regarding their sexuality throughout the entire series. Of course, the title refers not to the bathroom wall, but to Pam's mural in the warehouse, which has lewd pictures drawn on it, and she sets out to find the culprit.

Question 7

"I'm glad she has a friend at work that she can get through the day with. That way she's not all, 'blah blah blah' when she gets home."

The Office skewers gender politics in the workplace frequently, but perhaps none more directly than the episode titled "Boys and Girls" in Season 2. When Jan arrives from corporate to lead a woman only meeting, Mike uses the warehouse to counteract with a male version, and inadvertently causes the workers there to decide to unionize when a conversation of pay disparity between the downstairs laborers and the upstairs paper pushers breaks out. The episode ends with the warehouse completely destroyed due to Michael's negligence.

Question 8

"I hate the idea that someone out there hates me. I even hate thinking that Al-Qaeda hates me. I think if they got to know me, they wouldn't hate me."

While many employees of Dunder Mifflin get through the day with overblown confidence (Scott, Michael and Schrute, Dwight, to name a pair), there are quite a few that genuinely try to be pleasant to work with. This is made complicated in Season 5, Episode 14, when Pam is forced to see Jim's ex Karen on a visit to the Utica Branch of Michael's "Lecture Circuit", hr rep Holly's branch in Nashua is purposely skipped over by ex-boyfriend Michael, Phyllis finds herself with an opportunity to use a secret about Angela to blackmail her, and Andy is awkwardly rejected when trying to kiss a female client.

Question 9

"Halpert! Tall, queer, handsome as ever."

Dunder Mifflin sure seems to have a lot of inappropriate language for the workplace, and few do it more so than this character, who makes a usually loud entrance in an episode titled "Ben Franklin" in Season 3, Episode 14. Michael who has taken it upon himself to plan bachelor parties for both Bob Vance and his fiancé Phyllis, gets advice from this person to have strippers at both events, leading to confusion when a certain costumed founding father arrives as a historical re-enactor instead.

Question 10

"When I get frustrated, or irritated or... angry, I come up here and I just smell all my candles and it just -poof- goes away."

In an episode titled "The Dinner Party" in Season 4, The Office does a rare thing, and features an episode shot almost entirely outside of the work place. Instead Andy, Angela, Dwight, Jim and Pam find themselves held hostage by a clearly dysfunctional couple that ends in a shouting match leading to the destruction of a $200 flat screen TV. They are also subject to an awkward sales pitch to buy candles, wondering if the whole night was just a front to try to get sales.

Question 11

"Mike gave me a list of his top ten Springsteen songs. Three of them were Huey Lewis and the News. One was Tracy Chapman, Fast Car. And my personal favorite, Short People."

In yet another scheme to raise money for the office, Michael throws "Crime Aid" to throw off the scent that it may have been him and girlfriend Holly who left the Dunder Mifflin Scranton Branch unlocked the night before it was robbed. He claims to have tickets to see The Boss as the hot item of the event, which of course is a lie. As he frequently does, he turns to the music expert of his employees to help create some dramatic energy towards the big, disappointing reveal.

Question 12

"It's so scary how right the things you're saying are. And you're coming at it with almost no knowledge, so of course I trust your opinion on this."

"Heavy Competition", Season 5, Episode 24, sees a new corporation vying for Dunder Mifflin's companies in an unexpected place... The Michael Scott Paper Company. Dwight is having secret meetings to give intel to Michael about his new boss Charles, played by Idris Elba in a guest star appearance, but soon betrays his former boss and they rush to each try to land a big client. Conspiracies abound elsewhere in the office as Andy starts to suspect that a friend of his will be portrayed by his love.

Question 13

"So, Tuesdays and Thursdays, I'm up there. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I'm down here. I can think of no better way to confront my deathly fear of flying."

By the time Season 8 rolls around on The Office, there begins to be a very different cast of characters, led by boss Robert California, played by James Spader, while Andy has been named regional manager following Michael's departure. With the corporate offices of Sabre, who bought our Dunder Mifflin, located in Florida, various employees soon begin to take trips to corporate down south. But there is only one who seems truly caught between both worlds to great comedic effect.

Question 14

"Uh, 6783's also a good time. Less mileage."

Since we are on the theme of characters with great one-liners from Season 1 all the way through Season 9, this person's response to Meredith speaks volumes about their ability to say effortlessly weird and perhaps even mildly insane sentences on a regular basis and somehow continue to hold down their job. Perhaps more than any other character, we have little idea what they actually do at the office, how old they are, or even what their real name is.

Question 15

"I have six roommates. Heh. Which are better than friends, you know ‘cause they have to give you one month’s notice before they leave."

Sticking with the final season of The Office and the theme of long time characters, this quote actually comes from the final episode, aptly called "Finale." This character returns for the reunion at Dwight's wedding, despite having been fired by the same man who finally realized his dream and became the new boss. Known throughout the series for his loneliness and his inability to be rid of despite numerous attempts from particular higher-ups, he also notes upon his return that he was attempting to write The Great American Novel.

Question 16

"Hey. I just wanted you to know that you can't just say the word 'bankruptcy' and expect anything to happen."

In an episode aptly titled "Money" in Season 4, it is revealed that Michael is swimming in debt and had to get a second job as a telemarketer, to the chagrin of his new boss, former temp Ryan. He turns to arguably the most logical member of the office for advice, and finally realizes it's time to declare bankruptcy, and tell girlfriend Jan the truth of what has happened in his life. He dramatically declares it to the office, prompting this somewhat confused response.

Question 17

"Sometimes the clothes at the GapKids are just too flashy. So, I am forced to go to American Girl store and order clothes for large colonial dolls."

In Episode #21 in Season 3, the women of Dunder Mifflin join Michael for a special "Women's Appreciation" trip to the mall, a degrading idea to many, but they do realize they have some things they could buy so they tag along anyway. This after accountant Phyllis is the victim of a flasher, causing Dwight to play hero and order Pam to draw a police sketch of the criminal, which she does of his face. Meanwhile, Michael turns to the ladies for dating advice and the men of the office discover the wonder of the woman's room.

Question 18

"My last job was at Taco Bell Express. Then they became a full Taco Bell and I just couldn't keep up."

This Dunder Mifflin secretary's office boyfriend convinces boss Michael to take her to lunch for the day, despite his chagrin in doing so as he finds her a little boring, with the above quote serving as proof during their meal. Michael being Michael, he reveals to her that there was a prior relationship in the office between the man she is seeing and someone else, and she goes back to confront him, causing the whole situation to backfire on the unsuspecting guy.

Question 19

"You don't think he walked by that bakery just for the smell of it?"

Michael goes missing in an episode titled "The Search" in Season 7, when Jim gets an emergency call that his child is sick, and leaves him in a gas station bathroom without knowledge of what happened, without cellphone or wallet which are still in the car. The employees that know Michael best go looking for him, leading to two of the ones that have the most affection for him squaring off as to which direction he most likely wandered, with the bakery turning out to be correct.

Question 20

"Fire the employee, yes, but not the man. You may not cancel his soul."

The departure of Steve Carell (aka Michael Scott) from The Office following Season 7 left a gaping hole that was impossible to fill, so the series smartly added a group of new characters to fill his big shoes. This character was introduced in Florida in a Season 8 episode titled "Last Day in Florida", where they were given the task to head the new Sabre store, and named none other than Dwight vice president, only to have Jim have to step in to save his old nemesis from being fired when it's discovered it was a corporate plan for the project to fail all along, leaving Todd Packer instead as the fall guy.

Question 21

"I've always been good at anything that required balance. My doctor says I have gigantic inner ears."

Season 9, Episode 1 is titled "New Guys" for the introduction of two major characters into the office that are nicknamed "New Jim" and "Dwight, Jr." In perhaps an ode to the "as much as things change they stay the same" cycle of life in a workplace, one of the two of them strikes up a new romance with secretary Erin Hannon while the other vies to be noticed by the boss to move up the company ladder. The Office has come full circle.

Question 22

"You don't get to be the most powerful woman in Tallahassee by slacking off. You get there by working hard or marrying rich, and I did both."

In Season 6, Dunder Mifflin is bought out by a large corporation named Sabre, leading Michael Scott to clash with the changes to the fiefdom he has built, finally being questioned for his, well, questionable work ethic and management style. In Episode 19, titled "St. Patrick's Day", he panics when warehouse worker Darryl is promoted and given a space in the main office, and on a day which the office wants to go party, they are held late, as this boss has made an impromptu visit.

Question 23

"Sometimes the flowers arrange themselves."

When Nellie Bertram arrives to Scranton in "Get The Girl" towards the end of Season 8, boss Andy Bernard has decide to drive to Florida to win secretary Erin back after she tells him she is not coming back north. Nellie, following the failed Sabre store launch, has been transferred to the new branch, sees Andy's empty desk and claims it. When her territorial takeover is disputed by some employees, her offer of raises starts to win them over, to the chagrin of Jim, who can't believe what's happening, to which this character offers sage wisdom.

Question 24

"I ground up four extra-strength aspirin and put them in Michael's pudding. I do the same thing with my dog to get him to take his heartworm medicine."

When Michael burns his foot on a George Foreman grill in "The Injury", Season 2, Episode 12, he will not rest until the office recognizes his pain. Only loyal stalwart Dwight will help, who immediately crashes his car in the rush to take Michael to the ER, causing a real injury in the form of a concussion. While they scramble to actually aid Dwight, the pressure is on Michael's support staff of choice, namely Jim, Pam, and Ryan, to figure out to do with both of them.

Question 25

"Should he develop feelings for me, well, that would be permissible under item 7C, clause 2, so I would not object."

Continuing with the theme of romance, it is in the air once again for Dunder Mifflin employees in Episode 3 of Season 7, titled "Andy's Play." The full office is invited to a local production of Sweeney Todd, one in which Andy Dwyer has a major role, while Michael Scott was left off the cast list after auditioning by performing a full episode of Law & Order by himself. Jim and Pam are parents by now, but that leaves new and old trysts still to be worked out.

See Your Result
Questions Left
Current Score