Which Celebrity D-Bag Are You?

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In the modern world, it's pretty much accepted that if you're famous, you're going to be a total douchebag at some point in your life. It just comes with the territory. You hand somebody that sort of power, fame, and money then they're going to be a bit of a douche. In fact, some people have actually managed to make their fame and fortune based on how much of a douchebag they are. The modern obsession with a total douchebag has led some people to recreate themselves as somebody who everyone hates, as they know this will get people to listen to them and give them money. We know this is insane and we hope that you know it's insane as well.

However, that doesn't mean you can't languish in other people being total douchebags we suppose, as long as you don't give them the time of day or your money. Rather than doing that, maybe we can use these people as an example of how we're all sometimes a little bit of a douchebag, usually in the same way that these famous people are all the time. Through this quiz, we'll be able to tell you which of these celebrities is your inner douchebag.

So, you ready to answer our questions and find out which celebrity douchebag you're most like? Want to know which celebrity your friends see you as when you're out and being a total douchebag? Well then, let's get started and find out just how much of a douchebag you really are!

Question 1

Pick An Age

We'd like to think that the older people get, the less likely they are to do be horrible, but if you've ever spent time around an older douchebag then you know that's just not true. Unsurprisingly, once all of the youthful fun has been drained out of someone and they start to come close to death, they can sometimes actually become worse human beings, unable to separate everyone else from their sad state of affairs, which is a real shame if you ask us!

Question 2

How Would You Describe Yourself?

If you've ever been to a job interview then you know that these people who you want to work for will essentially come up with anything they can to make you look like you're the most unqualified person that they've ever seen, which is pretty counterproductive if you ask us. Asking someone to describe themselves is borderline passive aggressive, as anyone who is worth anything knows that as long as you’re happy within yourself for who you are, nothing else matters.

Question 3

Pick A Television Show

If anybody ever tells you that you need to throw away your television, just remind them that they live during what is referred to as "The Golden Age Of Television." This is the best time to be watching the idiot box because people are really spending a lot of time on the stuff that ends up making it into the television at the moment. If anything, more now than any other time in the past, you should be watching the television.

Question 4

Pick A Superpower

Weird to think that some of the things that you spent so much of your childhood talking about haven't passed through your lips in years, almost as if what you have to talk about now that you're older is more important. However, we know that this isn't true either because we know for a fact that most adults are spending their time still talking about stupid garbage that has nothing to do with the world around them or how they can make it better.

Question 5

Pick A Fish

Okay, we're not sure we can really defend this one if we're being honest. We can understand why somebody would argue that the type of fish that you would pick wouldn't actually have any effect on the sort of douchebag you'd be, but we'd argue that it does. For all you know, we've made a lot of studies that actually show that particular people pick particular types of fish. We’re not saying we have, but we might have done that.

Question 6

Pick A Halloween Costume

We've never really got Halloween or understand why it's such an institution that people respect in certain areas of the world. There is nothing about it that we enjoy as an adult as the whole holiday has lost the magic that it had as a child. Now, you either stay in to constantly have your house bombarded by people looking for candy, or you go out into town and you spend your night chatting to people with way too much skin on show.

Question 7

Pick A Sex & The City Character

Okay, now we're really getting down to what sort of douchebag you are because we all know that every single character in Sex & The City is a total douchebag who deserves none of our attention whatsoever. If you actually met any of the people in that show in real life, you would definitely turn around in run in the opposite direction. It's like the writers on this show were trying to create a group of the worse human beings that have ever existed.

Question 8

Pick A Piece Of Clothing

When you think about it, clothes are a pretty weird item in our everyday lives. We put so much effort and thought into them, but the only reason we bother with them is that they keep us dry and warm. Rather than finding the most comfortable items of clothing that help us stay feeling pleasant, instead we put ourselves through pain and suffering, just so that we can look nice for the people we see throughout our day. Pretty weird.

Question 9

Pick A Sport

We've never liked sport and we never will, so we only put these sort of questions in for everyone else who is normal and therefore has some sort of affinity with a sport. Seriously, it feels like everybody else in this world has at least one sport that they think is really good, but we just don't have it in us to pretend these days. We don't like sport and we're proud to say it! Come fight us if you don’t like it.

Question 10

Pick A Film

We've not been watching films for the past few years, having spent them playing video games, writing things, and reading books, but now that we actually are taking the few hours a week to really delve into the Western cinematic history, we're realizing how much we've been missing! Every night is pretty much always filled with some form of film enjoyment now, and even if we don’t enjoy what we watch, it gives us a better idea of what we do or do not want from a film in the future.

Question 11

Pick A Shoe Size

What could this possibly have to do with how much of a douchebag you are? Well, nothing, but we think that people still talk and obsess about how big people's feet are into adulthood, to the point where it's pretty much parallel to how people talk about it during childhood. Do you remember how important that used to be? Nowhere near as important as what sorts of shoes you were actually wearing but still. No matter what it was about, it never actually was important.

Question 12

Pick An Accessory

Unless they have a functional use, like a watch, the way we use accessories is just as ridiculous as the way we use our clothes to show off to others how well we are doing in this world. We're sure this doesn't apply to everyone who does this, but it's usually a sign that they respect money more than they do anything else. Not only that, but it shows us that they’re pretty insecure about who they are as a person underneath the clothes.

Question 13

Pick An Instrument

If you're anything like us, you wish your parents were the kind of people who force their kid to continue playing an instrument when they stop, as you'd be thanking them once you got older and were able to play amazing songs and compositions. Our parents weren't like that, which we're sure made us a lot happier when we were children but is pretty devastating now that we’re adults with no other skills than the ability to write this stuff for you.

Question 14

Pick A Color

When we were kids, we always remember picking a random color every time somebody asked us which our favorite color was, because we genuinely didn't have one. To this day, we'd probably say blue or black, but we don't really have a favorite color at all. We think that all colors can look absolutely amazing when put in the right place or paired with the right palette, which probably sounds like a cop out to you, but to us, it sounds like common sense.

Question 15

What Would We Find In Your Fridge?

There's nothing sadder than looking into a friends fridge, especially if they've recently been going through a particularly tough time, and finding that they've got pretty much nothing in there. This means that they don't respect themselves enough to bother going out and buying food, instead choosing to get takeaway food, and swallowing something terrible that is likely helping to slowly kill them. This might sound pretty bleak to you, but that’s just how our brains work around here. We always jump straight to the bleak.

Question 16

Pick A Personality Trait

Do you ever stop and think about the people or events in your life that have essentially shaped the human being that you are today, and what it is about you that now pulls in the sort of people who want to spend time with you. It's a pretty crazy rabbit hole once you actually sit back and really start to analyze it. You have no idea how different your personality traits would be if you just happened to have changed something minor at some point in your life.

Question 17

Pick An Alcoholic Drink

If you're the sort of person who doesn't really drink, then we're sorry for this question, but maybe you could just pick the drink that you think you're most likely to pick once you start being fun? Was that a low blow? It probably was pretty uncalled for, but then that's the sort of people we are around here! We know you can be fun without drinking alcohol, so don't get too upset about that joke. Or do. We don’t care.

Question 18

How Would Others Describe You?

Once again, to anybody out there who thinks that people are looking at them and coming out with the opinion that, generally speaking, they're worth laughing at or disliking just for who they are, you don't need those people in your life. It doesn’t matter if they don’t like you, as long as you like you. We all know that deep down, the bad people in this world don’t like themselves, which is why they die unhappy at the end of it all.

Question 19

Pick A Song

We used to judge people quite a lot by the sort of music that they listened to, but now we don't really resort to it a lot because we know that it doesn't matter at all when you really get down to the sort of human being they are. Sure, judge them for who they vote for and how they act but don't go judging people just for what sort of entertainment they enjoy. There's no love in that. Only hate.

Question 20

Pick A Singer

Crazy to think that there are some people being born right now who could be the next world famous singer, born with a talent that none of us could ever hope to achieve. Singing is really one of those things you can't get good at. You can practice and get better, but you can't go from not being able to sing to having the skill. There aren't many skills like that in this world, so singing is great if you've got it.

Question 21

Pick A Brand Of Car

Honestly, if you're looking to go and buy a car soon, we really hope you'll be looking for whichever car is the most comfortable to drive and not which one you will look the coolest driving around in. People who care about how they look while they're driving around in a car are literally some of the worst people in the world. It’s a form of transport and should be seen as such, rather than being seen as a way to show off.

Question 22

Pick A Phobia

We reckon that a lot of people who say they have phobias are actually just slightly afraid of something to the point where they ham it up whenever they are exposed to something they don't like. We know that any amount of fear is unpleasant, but there are literally people out there who will be sick at the sight of a spider and curl up into the fetal position. Those are the people with a real problem who need to work on their issues.

Question 23

How Do You Have Your Steak Prepared?

Seriously, the amount of conversations we've been through as adults concerning how we have our steak prepared is one of the most insane aspects of growing up if you ask us. It's almost as if people think that they can tell how much they're going to hate you depending on how you happen to have your steak. No, you can't. However, you can definitely tell how much of a douchebag somebody is going to be based on how they have their steak prepared.

Question 24

Pick A Type Of Soup

We don't care what anybody says when it comes to soup because we believe that pretty much everyone in this world knows that soup is a total devil but just won't accept this fact. Soup is like food for people who can't decide whether they want a drink or not. Sure, we've all had soup when we were ill, but that doesn't mean it's a food worth considering once we've managed to fight off the flu and we’re onto normal food.

Question 25

Pick A Form Of Transport

There was a short period of time where we really didn't like public transport, not because of the people who got on with us, but because we felt that the people who were already on public transport weren't so keen on us. That may sound weird to people who don't understand the sort of social anxiety that can run through many of our heads, but it's a real thing. That being said, trains are pretty awesome if you can manage to sit through them.

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