We know what it’s like to be head over heels for someone; to pine after them for months -- sometimes even years-- with no clear-cut sign that they feel the same way. It’s a rough situation to be in for sure, which often results in you putting a lot of other romantic options on the back burner.
But with the new year upon us, we’re here to tell you that it’s either time to go for or it or move on with your life. But first, we’ll have to figure out what the current situation is with your crush.
Though you certainly know your life better than anyone else, your emotional investment in everything, coupled with all your faults and insecurities, may actually make you blind to how other people perceive you. Even if you’re not one of them, there are people out there that have zero ability to pick up on the non-verbal communication from others, which is a huge problem in the dating world.
After all, no one wants to come right out and tell their crush that they're falling for them -- it's far too vulnerable. Therefore, you need to learn to drop subtle clues and hope they pick up the scent.
So let's find out if you're missing the signs that your crush is putting out!
1Do they ever send you flirtatious snap chats?
Are they constantly sending you cute selfies through personalized snap chats? Unless they’re someone that literally flirts with everyone they talk to, this is a sure fire way to know they’re interested. And if they are overly flirtatious, your efforts may not even be worth the trouble.
2Are you guys on the same attractiveness level?
Of course, looks aren't everything. But if you're pining for someone who is way better looking than you, it sadly does make your chances of getting with them slightly less optimistic. If this is the case, you may want to just go for it sooner rather than later.
3Do you both stay up late texting each other?
If your crush is willing to stay up to the glow of their phone in the wee hours of the night for you, they’re either really interested or really lonely. For your sake, we’ll go with the former and gander a guess that they’re definitely down to date.
4When you’re texting, do they constantly send you one and two word answers?
If your crush is genuinely kind-hearted, they may not want to hurt your feelings and tell you outright that they’re not interested. As a result, they may carry on the conversation that you fire up, but if they’re only texting back one in two work responses, you’re wasting your time.
5Are they currently seeing someone else?
If your crush is currently dating someone else, it doesn’t mean that your chances are totally shot, it just means you have another obstacle in your way. If you know their relationship is on the rocks, you may be in luck. But if they seem 100% solid, you may want to move on.
6Have you been friends for a long time?
We’ve all seen the internet rejoice when one lonely sap finally makes his way out of the friend-zone. It’s no easy feat since it could always result in a damaged friendship, but it can certainly be achieved if you’re up to the task.
7Do they ever text you first?
Are you always the one sending out “Good morning” and “What are you up to?” texts? Even if they’re also nice and respond back, it may be a sign that they’re not romantically interested if they never fire up the conversation on their own from time to time.
8When you’re talking, do they ever lean towards you?
Body language is by far the number one way you’ll be able to tell if someone is interested in you. While they may be too afraid to tell you outright that they like you, watch for physical clues, like them leaning in every time that you guys talk.
9Do you ever catch them mirroring your gestures?
On top of leaning toward you, people will often mirror the gestures of the person they like. So if you cross your legs, they may end up crossing their’s shortly after. Or if you touch your face, they may subconsciously do the same thing to themselves.
10Do they make excuses to touch you?
When they laugh do they reach out and touch your arm? Do they show you something on your phone to get close? Do they sit close enough to you that your sides are touching? All of these could be a sure sign that they’re interested in being more than friends.
11Are they shy?
Throwing shyness into the equation can make it ten times harder to figure out of someone is interested in you. All of the normal signs that you’d be looking out for may not exist. So if this is the case, you may just have to go for it.
12Have you asked them out before?
If you've asked them out before and they didn't immediately respond with enthusiasm, then there's a good chance that they're not that interested. Sure, their excuses about not being able to make it may have been convincing, but if they really are into you, they'd find the time.
13Do they make excuses to not hang out with you?
Whether it be a sick cat, a headache, or a previous engagement — if your crush is giving out one excuse after another they’re definitely not interested. And if they really were having a busy few weeks, they’d be sure to make it up to you sometime down the line.
14How did you two meet?
Did you meet under the preconceived notion that you were looking for someone to date — like through a dating app or a blind date? Or did you just meet each other through happenstance — like work or school? These instances could definitely affect how your crush first thought of you.
15Do they vent to you about their current love life?
This can be a slippery slope, considering that it may mean they only think of you as a friend, or that they trust with their deepest thoughts. So you have to judge if this talk is an extension of flirting or an ignorance of your feelings.
16Do they ever refer to you as their “best friend,” “little sis,” or “big bro?”
This is definitely not a good sign, and may explicitly mean that they only see you as a friend and nothing more. While this doesn’t necessarily mean that all hope is lost, it does mean that they’re feeling for you are going to have to do a total 180.
17Do they ever tell you about the concerts they’d like to go to, places they’d like to eat, etc?
If they’re shy or the female in the relationship, there’s a good chance that they’ll be waiting for you to ask them out. But they may be giving you a ton of open opportunities to do so, like bringing up common events that you could attend together.
18What do you two usually do together?
Do you currently hang out with your crush on a regular basis? If it’s in the midst of a group hang out, then you’ll probably need to find a way to carve out some one-on-one time at some point to get a better gauge of their interest in you.
19Do you lay awake every night fantasizing about dating them?
If you’ve been obsessing over your crush every night with little sign that they feel the same way, you may need to distract yourself with something else for the time being. Otherwise, you might end up coming off way to desperate next time you see them.
20Have they ever cried in front of you?
Unless they wear their heart on their sleeve at all time, crying in front of someone is a pretty vulnerable emotional state to be in. If this has ever happened, you at least know that they completely trust you with their feelings, which is a good spot to be in.
21What do your friends say about the situation?
If you’re truly on the fence about going for it, your best bet may be to confide in some close friends about your possible options. They may have a more realistic view of the situation then you, as their thoughts won’t be clouded with anxiety or attraction.
22Are you currently dating someone else?
This one admittedly has less to do with whether or not your crush likes you, and more to do with the way you approach relationships. So if you’re getting ready to make a move on your crush you should definitely break up with your partner first.
23If you were to ask them out, what would you do for your first date?
If you ever plan to make your fantasy relationship into a reality, you should at least have a realistic plan in mind for your first date. Take note, if you’re the one asking them out, people usually prefer if you have something specific in mind.
24Have you ever told them outright that you’re into them?
Similarly to asking them out on a first date, if you told your crush that you like them and they didn’t immediately seem interested, there’s a good chance that they’re not. It may also indicate that you need to learn to master the art of subtlety.
25What usually stops you from just asking them out?
Maybe the problem isn’t whether your crush is into you or not, but why you have such a fear of going for it. Recognizing the cause of your apprehension won’t just help when it comes to wooing the opposite sex, but will extend to all other aspects of your life.
26Have you ever wrote them a love letter, anonymous or otherwise?
Sending out an anonymous love letter or a straightforward text about your feelings is certainly a ballsy move. While it does help cut to the chase, most people prefer things to be unspoken at the start of a relationship. For instance, asking them out would be straightforward enough.
27How did you start dating your last girlfriend/ boyfriend?
If you’ve been in a relationship before and are looking to get into another one, maybe the best way to do so is see what worked for you in the past. For instance, if you had success asking out a previous crush, there’s no reason that it can’t happen again.
28What are you looking for from your crush?
Why are you interested in your crush in the first place? Is it because you want to date them? Or are you just looking for a one night stand? they could smell your true intentions a mile away, which might be another reason they’re giving off conflicting signs.
29Do you ever find them looking at you lips?
If you find them staring at your lips when you two are talking one-on-one, it may be a sure sign that they’re hoping you kiss them. Keep an eye out for other signs as well though, there’s always the chance that they’re staring at the broccoli between your teeth.
30Do they usually laugh at your jokes?
Having an innate sense of humor is a sure fire way to get people to like you fast. But does your crush find your jokes particularly funny? Maybe they even laugh at the ones that flop. If that’s the case, it’s definitely a point in your favor.
31Are their text messages full of exclamation points, smiley faces, and emojis?
These days, some people seem like they communicate exclusively through emojis. But if your crush isn’t usually one of them, and they have suddenly started responding to you with increased enthusiasm, they may also be trying to get your attention.
32What is your main form of communication with them?
People have become far too reliant on technology to communicate. After all, it’s easy to send out a text or a snapchat, but putting in the effort to meet with someone and converse with them in person is a legitimate way to gauge one’s interest these days.
33Do they stand or sit more upright when they see you?
Something as simple as straightening one’s posture can be an easy way to tell if they’re interested. While men are more inclined to stick out their chests and make themselves look bigger, women certainly aren’t beyond accentuating their curves for their crush.
34Do they tease you constantly?
There’s a fine line between teasing someone and full-blown making fun of them. But as we well know, this tactic of poking fun at your crush extends well beyond childhood and can carry through until high school, college, and even beyond.
35Do you two share a lot of inside jokes?
Are you two already sharing your own little world of in-jokes together? Since this is something that is usually reserved for close friends and couples, you may be well on your way toward a relationship with your crush after all.