Take This Relationship Quiz, And We'll Tell You At What Age You'll Have Kids!
- by Ricky Bambuto
- – on
- in Lifestyle
Since the dawn of mankind, people have been having kids. They've been doing this consistently, generation after generation. The more kids people have, the more people there are. The more people there are, the more things we have, and the more things there are for the next people to have. In order for those next people to get here, we need to have kids. Whoa whoa, hold your horses. We don't need to do it right now.
Having kids is a big trip. Since there's no real line we cross from childhood to adulthood (legal drinking age doesn't equal cosmic adulthood), we're never quite sure when it's time to have kids. Of course, falling in love makes chemical streams in the body that tell us to have kids, but even those are easy to ignore if you don't feel ready to be a parent.
The whole thing is hard to wrap your mind around. It's so complicated that, sometimes, you might catch yourself wishing that someone - perhaps a maker of social media quizzes - would just spell out your parenthood age already, so you don't have to think about it anymore.
Well, step into our little booth. It's a little rickety, but it does the trick. As we gaze into our crystal ball, answer these relationship questions, and we'll reveal at what age you'll have kids.
Were you and your partner friends before dating?
Here's Harry, and that's his friend Sally. Well, they started as friends, but as you might know, they ended up being together. As it turned out, this story would wrap up in a "happily ever after" type of way. Is your relationship like theirs?
How long have you been seeing each other?
Some couples tie the knot and have kids in relatively no time at all, after maybe a year or two of seeing each other. Then there are couples who make a point of spending years together before making a long term decision. How long have you been seeing each other?
Are you married?
Wait, before we continue, there's one important thing we need to get out of the way here, which if whether you two are married. If you are, then kids should be right around the corner, if we're to follow traditional formulas.
How long have you been at your job?
If you've been at your job for a while, you might be starting to set the financial foundation needed to properly support a child. If you're not, then you might have some work to do before you're ready. So which is it?
How long has your partner been at their job?
What we said in that last entry applies to your partner, for sure. After all, if you two have kids, you won't be the only one responsible for buying the diapers and baby food. How long has your partner been at their job?
Do you both have similar ambitions?
If you two generally share your ambitions, there's a chance that one of those ambitions includes tying the knot and having kids. If you're both on the same page, you'll be having kids sooner rather than later. Do you share ambitions, generally?
Is your partner punctual?
If your partner is on time, that's a great thing. It means that, if you two were together, you'll be less likely to spend cumulative days and weeks waiting for them. They'll show up to parenthood. Not to say anything bad about un-punctual people, of course.
How often do you go on dates?
If you two go on dates every other night, good for you. It's a sign of a healthy relationship when couples go out with each other several times a month. However, you should know that this sort of dating life will stop when you have kids.
What sign is your partner?
If your partner is of a certain astrological sign, this may or may not affect the age at which you'll have kids. Of course, if you believe in all that stuff. Even if you don't, look up their birthday real quick, and tell us their sign.
Do you dress up in matching costumes for Halloween?
Dressing up in matching costumes for Halloween is either super tasteful, or super tacky, depending on who you ask. Since we're a neutral party, we won't reveal our opinion on the matter, but we definitely have an opinion on the matter.
What star rating would you give your relationship?
Let's say you were a film critic, and you had to review the rom com of your current relationship. Compress all your most relevant memories together into a clean hour and thirty minutes, then watch the movie in your mind. How many stars do you give it?
How many kids do you want to have?
Okay, this sounds like an important point of consideration for someone looking to have kids. Eventually, the question becomes not if you want to have kids, but how many kids you're actually looking to have. So, how many is it?
Does he/she know your deepest secret?
If your SO knows your deepest, darkest secret, then that's a surefire sign that you're opened your heart to them enough to want to have kids with them. At this point, the question only becomes when, and not if.
How often do you go on double dates?
Almost every couple goes on dates, but they won't all necessarily make a practice of double dating. That sort of thing is only for serious couples, of high rank on the pairing scale. Do you and your partner often double date?
Have you ever gone on vacation together?
A couple who vacations together stays together, or was that saying about Netflix? Anyway, that's not important here. If you've vacationed with your partner, you're that much closer with them, and that much closer to having kids.
Do you live together?
If you live with your partner, you've already broken through a serious boundary. Understandably, you'd be putting yourself in a position to be surprised if you wait till marriage to discover what it's like to live with your partner.
How often do you hang out with your friends?
Hanging out with friends is fun, and highly recommended. However, there's simply almost no time to do it after you and your partner make a baby. If you're ready to sacrifice your going out time, you might be ready to have kids.
How often does your partner hang out with their friends?
Of course, because a couple consists of two, the above idea also applies to your partner. The last thing you want is to drag them into a life away from their friends before they're ready for it. How often does your partner hang out with their friends?
How mature would you say your partner is?
If you had to label your partner as strictly mature or not so mature, which would it be? Sure, maturity runs a spectrum, but you at least have an idea of how mature they'd behave as a parent. What do you say?
How mature would you say you are?
You didn't think we'd let you off the hook, did you? Your parents needs to be mature to a certain extent if they're looking to be a parent, and you need to be the same way. If you'd have to give us an answer (which you do), would you say you're mature?
Do you have a pet name for each other?
Pet names are another one of those things that are either adorable or atrocious depending on who you ask. You fall on one end of the argument or another, inevitably, and we'll know which one by having you answer the question.
Do you have a pet together?
Pet names are one thing, and they're not a very important thing at that. Pets themselves, on the other hand, are very important. They live and breathe, and they demand responsibility from their owner - or owners, if owned by a couple.
Are you both financially secure?
As we mentioned above, a financially secure foundation is the best way to ensure a worry-free upbringing for a child, worry-free in the financial sense, of course. If you're both financially free, so will your child be.
Do you get along with their parents?
If you're looking to live happily ever after with your soulmate, understand that the package includes getting along with your in-laws. Believe us, the last thing you want is a feisty in-law getting in the way of your life, and you equally don't want to be a feisty kid in-law.
Do they get along with your parents?
Of course, the same rule applies to your partner. You love them, just as you love your parents, and everyone has a better chance of living happily ever after if the whole group gets along. Does your partner have a good relationship with your folks?
Have you ever been close to breaking up?
Some relationships are roller coaster rides. The love is there, and it may be true, it just expresses itself in huge bursts of energy separated by varying spans of time. If you're in one of those pairings, you might have come close to breaking up at one point or another.
How often do you fight?
Going with the theme of roller coaster-esque relationships, yours might be the kind that often includes a verbal brawl once in a while. We're not saying that your arguments affect the age you'll have kids, but we're not saying it doesn't, either.
Do you fight in public?
Every couple fights at one point or another, but only a select few do so publicly. Of course, in certain cases, like the one pictured in the Sex and the City wedding here, might warrant a public outburst. Do you and your partner fight in public?
Do you watch Netflix together?
Some modern philosophers say that a couple who watches Netflix together stays together. Come to think of it, that would mean the vast majority of young couples today are destined to live happily ever after. This is great news! Do you watch Netflix together?
How often do you think about your future family life?
If starting a family with your partner and having kids is all you think about, that means you're mentally preparing yourself for this huge life transition. Should this be the case, you might be having kids sooner rather than later.
Does your partner ever talk about having kids?
At some point, your inner monologues about having kids might turn into an outer dialogue, that is, if your partner is on-board with you. If he/she is, then that effectively accelerates your parenthood clock. Are you two talking about having kids?
Do your philosophical views align with your partner's?
Opposites attract, so having opposing philosophical views with your partner isn't a red flag. However, generally having the same ideas about things gives you a better chance of agreeing on how to raise a child. Generally speaking, of course.
Which of these Disney couples do you two most resemble?
This is perhaps the most important question of our quiz, though it might also be the most insignificant. At any rate, think about it - if you had to choose which Disney couple you two most resemble, which would it be?
If, a week from now, you were surprised with news that a baby was on its way, how would you feel?
Say there was a test taken - a pregnancy test, let's say - and it came out positive. Let's say this didn't happen 5 years from now, but a week from now. Picture living this moment, and finding out the news - how do you feel?
Do you have any baby names in mind?
If your mind is already a blur of baby names, you might be ready to put a bun in the oven sooner rather than later. Of course, all other points of this quiz must also be considered, along with a few points outside of it, too. Answer this, and we'll reveal what age you'll be having kids.
