Rate These Video Games And We'll Guess Your Sexuality

Welcome to 2018, a year that promises new video games and the same video games (but rebooted). They may be new games, but let's be honest, are you really expecting yearly releases or games heavily dependent on microtransactions to feel like a new game this year? Be serious for a minute!

Jokes aside, this should be another strong year for video games, especially with titles like Red Dead Redemption 2Far Cry 5, and Spider-Man all set to drop in the coming months. Rather than think about how microtransactions will surely be in those games or how long they'll take to install, let's play a game where we have you rate games and that will tell us your sexuality.

People may not want to believe this, but certain game genres and titles appeal more to certain genders and sexualities. It's much more likely that a game with a major LGBT character will be more enjoyed by a gay man or a lesbian woman than a game without any sort of LGBT presence or where it's implied that everyone is straight.

Our only true ground rule for this quiz is that most of these games are recent releases (and we won't try to spoil anything) so if you're ready to see if we know your sexuality, let's get to work!

Question 1

Fallout

The definitive post-apocalyptic game and arguably the definitive RPG, Fallout has been everywhere from Washington D.C. to a new Las Vegas...creatively called New Vegas. Fallout 4 had mixed reception by some, but many continue to still love and adore the series. What do you think of the Fallout brand as a whole?

Question 2

Star Wars: The Old Republic

A divisive game for many Star Wars fans because of what it did to the original Knights of the Old Republic games, The Old Republic is essentially League of Legends in space...but you can use the Force and lightsabers. What do you think of The Old Republic MMO, not the series?

Question 3

Grand Theft Auto

Because Grand Theft Auto is Grand Theft Auto, we're going to do something different with this question. Do you find Grand Theft Auto, between killing innocents and hijacking cars, to be an offensive game? Or, are you able to look past all of that because it's nothing more than a satirical video game?

Question 4

Madden NFL

The innovative sports franchise that changed it all and has divided a fanbase in recent years, who doesn't want to hit people as hard as they can? Even in the midst of the NFL's concussion crisis, there's still such a feeling of satisfaction when you lay someone out in the open field. What do you think of Madden?

Question 5

Call of Duty

Call of Duty is to the shooter genre what Madden is to sports and Grand Theft Auto is to open world games: the trademark, even if things may not be what they once were in the eyes of fans. From World War II to space, what do you think of Call of Duty as a whole?

Question 6

The Sims

woohoo sims

Who doesn't want to make their own people, towns, lives, and so forth? The Sims is one of those series that will likely always be popular because of the customization it provides and the stories it can create, even if it's in one's head. What do you think of The Sims?

Question 7

Splatoon

Are you a kid or a squid? Or, are you someone that doesn't adhere to either label and is instead someone who enjoys playing the game like 99.1 percent of its fans who don't want to refer to themselves as kids or squids. What do you think of the Splatoon series?

Question 8

Overwatch

If you've never played Overwatch, the premise is this: there's over 20 playable characters that you can play as in a team-based format (this is the type of game that has killed single-player games) and they have all different powers and categories like Offense and Defense. What do you think of Overwatch?

Question 9

South Park

Perhaps more quietly than you'd expect, South Park has actually released two video games since 2014. That year brought The Stick of Truth, which satirized games like Skyrim, while 2017 satirized superheroes (mainly the MCU) in the form of The Fractured But Whole. Like with GTA, are you offended by these games?

Question 10

Life Is Strange

Not unlike Telltale's The Walking Dead games, Life Is Strange is a decision-based, story-driven game about supernatural elements. Rather than zombies, Max Caulfield instead has the ability to rewind time at any given moment, but has to deal with the butterfly effect and its resulting actions. What do you think about Life is Strange?

Question 11

Battlefield

You might know Battlefield for going from being Call of Duty's younger brother to a dominant force in its own right. You might know Battlefield for ending the futuristic shooter genre by returning to the ground with Battlefield 1. You might even know Battlefield for its controversial Friends Against Grenade Spam campaign. Why was that controversial? We'll let you figure it out as you answer here.

Question 12

Sonic the Hedgehog (Modern)

We had to put the (modern) disclaimer because as everyone knows, Sonic the Hedgehog games have been fairly inconsistent in their quality over the past 20 or so years. Sonic Forces -shown here - released in November 2017 to, as per usual, mixed reviews. What do you think of the more modern Sonic games?

Question 13

Batman: Arkham

After years of "meh" to disappointing superhero games, fans finally got a game that really felt like you were controlling the hero in question with Rocksteady's Batman: Arkham games. Starring Kevin Conroy as the Dark Knight and Mark Hamill as The Joker (Roger Craig Smith and Troy Baker filled in during Arkham Origins), these games are universally beloved. What did you think?

Question 14

NBA 2K

The first game that really felt like a basketball simulation, NBA 2K is still going strong in 2018, especially with an eSports league set to launch later this year. With beautiful graphics and immense MyCareer and MyLeague modes, there's no doubting the love many fans have for this game. What do you think of NBA 2K?

Question 15

Star Wars: Battlefront (EA)

We could talk for hours about the unfortunately-dead, Pandemic Studios-created Star Wars: Battlefront series, but it's instead the EA series we're discussing today. As we saw leading up to Battlefront II's release with the infamous microtransactions incident, fans are passionate about wanting the game to be for Star Wars fans and not casuals. How are you feeling about this game?

Question 16

Saints Row

Another of the more mature titles on this list, Saints Row went from a Grand Theft Auto clone to one of the more memorable open world games we've had in some time. This game really didn't offend so much as it did create laughs with toilet humor and giant dildos. What'd you think?

Question 17

Dragon Age

We mentioned South Park: The Stick of Truth tried to satirize games like Skyrim...well, they also tried to satirize and mock Dragon Age as well. Dragon Age is your stereotypical RPG with your normal classes - humans, mages, elves, and so forth - with villains that include spiders, ghosts, and even dragons! What did you think of Dragon Age?

Question 18

Mortal Kombat

Mortal Kombat

This and Street Fighter are the fighting games you've been playing for years and will likely continue to play. What other fighting games allow you to rip someone's spine out? With 2018 here, maybe we'll get the "Social Justice Warrior" fatality where they bring in white knights to kill you. How are you on Mortal Kombat?

Question 19

Candy Crush

Hey, Candy Crush may be a mobile game, but it's still addicting and still being played by a ton of people. Next time you go to the supermarket or a store, look how many mothers are playing Candy Crush on their phones! What do you think of the still-so-fun Candy Crush?

Question 20

MLB The Show

I'm not allowed to express my true thoughts on this series, but I will say *this sentence has been censored by Sony San Diego who is still mad about my 7/10 review* and I also think *this sentence has been censored by Sony San Diego who is still mad about my 7/10 review.* What do you think of MLB The Show?

Question 21

Mass Effect

The Mass Effect series provides decision-based thinking, lots of action, lots of sex, and even LGBT characters. In today's age, that is both remarkable and powerful - and we genuinely mean that. Without hearing your thoughts about the sex or the LGBT characters involved, what do you think about the Mass Effect series?

Question 22

Injustice

What if you took superheroes and had them fight 1-on-1 like Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat? The Injustice series tries bringing this concept to life, though they add concepts like alternate universes and a Robin who wants to be a badass. What have you taken away from the Injustice series so far?

Question 23

Fortnite

Officially, Fortnite has been described as a cross between Minecraft and Left 4 Dead. I'd add Overwatch in there as well because the character designs look alike, there's some team-based elements, and you need microtransactions to really enjoy this game. If you've played Fortnite early, what did you think of it?

Question 24

Assassin's Creed

What's the best way to describe Assassin's Creed? Is it a beat-em-up with stealth elements, or a stealth game with beat-em-up elements? People still discuss this years into the series, but one thing is for sure: if you haven't played it yet, buy the game and prepare for fun and Ubisoft glitches! What'd you think of Assassin's Creed?

Question 25

NCAA Football

Unfortunately, the NCAA Football series isn't likely to return for a long time - if ever - because of likeness lawsuits, players not getting paid, etc. But when this game was around, it was amazing and if you still have an Xbox 360 or PS3, you can play NCAA 14 with updated rosters. What'd you think of this series?

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