It's no secret that relationships are hard work, but they're best when decisions are made without a lot of fighting between the people in them. The best way to make this happen is to know who wears the pants in your relationship! If you know who the real decision maker truly is, you'll save yourself so many headaches and time, so this is a worthwhile thing to do!
Whether you are in a brand new relationship or in a well established one, it's important to figure out where you stand in the relationship. It's time to stop and take stock of where you stand! Are you the primary decision maker, or do you tend to fall to the background and go with the flow? When matters come up, whether they're insignificant or major, who decides how to go forward when you aren't exactly on the same page?
Knowing how to resolve conflict is the key to a successful relationship, so take this quiz and figure out where you stand so you can be happy together and work out disagreements with less stress and time! Whether you're wearing the pants or not, knowing will help you to build a stronger partnership.
1Time To Eat- Who Picks?
This is the primary thing that trips people up in a relationship. When you are picking some place to go out to eat, who picks? Is it you, or is it your partner? Who decides what place you should go to?
2Who Manages the Budget?
The personal who controls the money controls a lot! Do you decide where things are spent or not? Are you the one who sets the family budget for where the money is spent, or do you let your partner make these decisions? Who is the financial decision maker?
3Who Drives the Car?
This is an important control question! When you hop in the car, who gets in the driver's seat? Who sits and navigates? These are two really different roles, so which describes you? Are you the driver, or are you the passenger?
4Who Picks Vacations?
Vacations are fun, aren't they? It's a time to reconnect, a time to remember all of the things that bring you together. One of those things is where to go! Who picks where you vacation? Are you usually in charge, or not?
5Who Showers First?
The person who showers first gets the most hot water. They also get the most time to get dressed before work! Who takes the first shower in the morning? Is it always you? Is it never you? Who takes the first shower of the morning?
6Who Picked Where You Live?
We all know that it is a team decision to pick where you live, but someone always picks a little bit more. When you were picking where you currently live, who made the decision? Was it you, or was it your partner? Who made the decision? Who picked your home?
7Who Apologizes First?
Disagreements are unavoidable. It's sad but true! When you disagree, who says the "I'm sorry" first? This is a powerful indicator of where you stand in your relationship, and something to ponder. Who apologizes first? Is it you, or your partner?
8Who Committed First?
Who decided to make things exclusive first? When you're dating, usually you decide at a certain point to make things exclusive. You stop seeing other people, and just see that one person. Who made that commitment first? Who was ready to settle down first in the relationship?
9Who Said I Love You First?
Love is a wonderful thing, and a relationship full of love is the best! Who was the first person to say out loud that they loved the other person? Was it you? Was it the other person? Can you remember? Who said I love you first?
10Who Kept Their Friends?
Have you noticed yourself slowly becoming part of your significant other's friend group, or are they becoming part of your friend group? Or did you both keep your own friend groups? Who kept their friends, and who joined the new friend group?
11Who Controls the Remote?
When you're watching something on TV, who picks what is on? Who decides on the shows you normally watch? If no one has a strong preference, who decides? Is there someone who normally picks the TV or Netflix programming most of the time?
12Who Makes More Money?
We can't always control who has the higher paying job, but this does impact dynamics. Sometimes this matters a lot, and sometimes it doesn't. Who makes more money in your relationship? Is it you, or your partner? Who has the higher paying job?
13Who Crushed On Who?
When you first met, who felt the first click? When chased after that first date, was it you or your partner? When you met, one of you probably felt that things were "meant to be", so which one of you was it? Were you the one who felt like this relationship was destined to be more than just a friendship?
14Who Changed Their Social Media Status First?
A relationship is not serious until it is social media real, anymore, right? Who wanted to make things public to all of their friends and family on social media first? Was it you or your partner? Bringing your wider circle into the relationship is a serious step about where the relationship stands, and choosing to make the relationship public tells a lot about the relationship!
15Who Do People Talk To First?
When you enter a place like a restaurant, who do the waiters talk to first? Who has the body language the communicates that they're in control? This body language when you're together is an indicator of who wears the pants, so think hard about this! Do waiters talk to you first, or your partner?
16Who Is The Big Spoon?
When you cuddle, who is the outside, or big spoon? The outside spoon is usually the protective one, and this is the person who is in charge, too. Which partner is usually the big spoon in your relationship? Is it you, or is it your partner? Who likes to be which spoon?
17Who Texts First?
When you're not together, who sends that first check in text to see how things are going? Who wants to know how the other person is, or just wants to chat? Who is more tuned into keeping in contact, and initiates messages most of the time? Is it you, or your partner? Who starts the texts back and forth?
18Who Decorated You House?
You share living together, so it makes sense that your home is a reflection of both of you, right? Who picked most of the decorations in your home, and how it would look? Did you pick all the colors and types of furniture, or did they? Who decided what would go on the walls, and what would not? Who set the tone for your home?
19Who Named Your Pets?
Pets are an important part of our lives. We love them and make sure that they're happy. When you and your partner got a pet together, who picked the name for that pet? Who decided what that pet would be called? Did that person also pick the type of pet you'd get together?
20Who Gets More of the Blankets?
The endless blanket battles! This is when you are in bed, and sleeping, and someone rolls over and steals the blanket. Who is the blanket thief in your relationship? Who likes to roll up and take most of the blankets? Is it you, or your partner? Who takes most of the blankets in your relationship?
21Who Sets the Rules About Exes?
Nothing causes more drama than the exes in a relationship. Those ex boyfriends and girlfriends can cause a lot of heartache, so its a good idea to lay out ground rules for what is and isn't a good idea with them! Who decided what is ok in your relationship? Was it you, or your partner?
22When Someone Snores, Who Moves?
Snoring is a huge annoyance at night. It's so loud, and can really interfere with a sound night's sleep! When someone is snoring, who leaves the bed, you, or your partner? Do you keep the bed, and the go sleep on the couch? Do you go sleep on the couch and and they keep the bed? Who sleeps where?
23When You Fight, Who Leaves?
No one wants to think about a major fight with their significant other, but the reality is that sometimes this is unavoidable. When this happens and someone really loses their cool, who leaves the house? Who packs up and leaves to calm down, and think things through? Is it you, or is it your partner?
24Who Forgets Anniversaries?
Uh oh, this is a relationship faux pas! It isn't good to forget relationship milestones or birthdays, and this can be a good way to get into the dog house. Who tends to be the forgetful one, you or your partner? Who misses those important little dates and things, and who always remembers them?
25Who Is More Emotional?
Maybe more emotionally expressive is the more accurate question here. Who cries more often, and is more often expressing all of their emotions? Which partner in your relationship shows a lot of emotions, all of the time? Who seems to need a lot of reassurance and comfort? Is it you or your partner?
26Who Picks More Fights?
Who tends to have more issues that turn into fights? Do you feel like when you voice your opinion about things, it turns into fights most of the time? Or maybe when your partner voices theirs it turns into fights? Who tends to start most of the disagreements? Who is less secure in their opinions about things?
27Who Sets the Meal Plan?
Oh, food. Most people have really strong feelings about what they eat, and what they don't like to eat. Who lays out what is and isn't good food in your relationship? Who decides what food gets consumed when in your home? Is it you or your partner? Who decides on what meals will be what foods?
28Who Picks Your Electronics?
When you go in to pick things like shared electronics, who has the final say? Who picked your shared TV, for example? Who picked your toaster or refrigerator? Who made the decision on what would best suit your needs? Who did the research and made the decision on what would suit your budget and lifestyle?
29Who Picks Your Lifestyle?
Who picks big lifestyle changes, like going paleo or vegan, or starting a new exercise routine? These are big deals to take on, so it's a large thing to change! When you're debating something like this, who decides that it should be brought into the relationship, you or your partner? When something like this is decided, who sets the tone?
30Who Is Named First?
When people talk about you as a couple, how do your names get said? Is it Partner and You, or You and Partner? Which way do they tend to group you together for introductions and talking about you as a pair? How they talk about you indicates how they think about you, and how you present yourselves together!