Do You Belong In Pawnee Or Scranton?


The Office and Parks and Recreation are a fantastic pair of shows. It's impossible to pick a favorite, and even more impossible to pick which one you'd rather live in. Both Scranton and Pawnee are painted as wacky and fun places to live in. There are some terrific restaurants in both cities, from Tom's Bistro to Alfredo's Pizza (but NOT Pizza by Alfredo) to the dinosaur-themed Jurassic Fork. There are great places to work, even if the workplace is as boring as the Parks Department or a paper company. And not to mention the neighbors you would have!

You can either live among Michael Scott, Jim and Pam, Kevin Malone, Dwight Schrute, and Creed (but beware, because he's probably a murderer), or you can live among Leslie and Ben, Andy and April, Ron Swanson, and Tom Haverford. You could have Chris Traeger running up and down your block, or maybe train on your own so you can outrun the Scranton Strangler. Both Scranton and Pawnee would be a great environment to live in; certainly very entertaining. There's no way you could pick who you'd rather be neighbors with out of Michael Scott and Leslie Knope, so we'll decide for you. Answer these 25 questions to see which town you belong in: Scranton or Pawnee.

Question 1

What do you think of your sister city?

Your twin town is pretty much "the town next door." It's the one just next to yours. You can either be friendly with your neighbors across the border, choose not to acknowledge them and get on with your life, or have a serious and intense rivalry with them, Homer Simpson and Ned Flanders-style. Do you hate your twin town?

Question 2

Do you enjoy the personal touch of a salesman?

A lot of people do their shopping online now, but you don’t get to speak to someone and connect with them when you buy something on Amazon or eBay or anything like that. Some people still prefer the personal touch of a salesman. Do you still prefer the personal touch of a salesman?

Question 3

Do you mind raccoons?

Let's say there was an infestation of raccoons in your town. Like, a serious infestation. The city council doesn’t really care about it, so they’re not doing anything about the raccoons. One or two people do care, but it’s not enough, so raccoons are still running rampant in the city. Would that bother you?

Question 4

How important are parks to you?

It might not bother you. You might never go to the park, or if you do, it’s so you can shoot up smack in a nice, secluded, open space. But some people like to walk in the park and feed the ducks. Do you like a well-kept park that is kept in check by government workers who care?

Question 5

Where would you rather buy your groceries?

​A very important part of living is where you buy your groceries, and you want to make sure you're shopping at the right place. So, which of these two stores would your rather shop at? (Bear in mind that at Gerrity's, you run the risk of bumping into a pregnant Jan.)

Question 6

What's your body type?

It's okay, no judgments. Some junk food and sugary drink corporations like Sweetums are shameless in their advertising and they can trick you into consuming thousands of empty calories. Perhaps if you are overweight, you'd rather be with your own kind in a town with an obesity problem. Are you overweight?

Question 7

Who is your favorite historical figure?

Most people have at least a few heroes who are rooted in history. Maybe you're crazy about MLK of JFK or maybe you're more of the kind of person who goes nuts for music icons like the Beatles or Mozart. Whatever your style, it definitely affects where you would fit in best.

Question 8

Which of these foods do you prefer?

Pizza or breakfast food. You might like both – you have breakfast foods like bacon, scrambled eggs, and pancakes for breakfast, and then a nice, juicy, succulent, greasy pizza later that night for dinner. But let’s say you had to choose between both of these food types, which is your favorite?

Question 9

Do you like Chili's?

Chili’s is a Tex-Mex chain that’s been around for decades. It’s gotten very popular over the years. They have some great baby back ribs there. But do you like it? Are you a Chili's fan? Because you never know, you might end up being honored at an awards ceremony there...

Question 10

Which game would you rather play?

Both Scranton and Pawnee have their fair share of geeks, from Battlestar Galactica super fan Dwight Schrute to Game of Thrones super fan Ben Wyatt to possible serial killer Toby Flenderson. And with the geeks come each town’s fair share of geeky games. Which of these would you rather play?

Question 11

Which baby is cuter?

There are plenty of cute babies born to both the residents of Scranton and the residents of Pawnee, because there are plenty of cute couples in both cities – Jim and Pam, Ben and Leslie, April and Andy, Chris and Anne etc. Which of these two babies do you think is cuter?

Question 12

Is it important for you to be near New York?

Scranton is a few hours' drive away from New York City. You can head to the city to attend art school or for a big job interview, or simply to see the stars, like Conan O'Brien or someone who you think is Tina Fey. But is that important to you?

Question 13

Do you support gay marriage?

The same sex marriage issue has been a huge hot button topic in the United States ever since it was first legalized in Massachusetts – and especially in the last couple of years since Barack Obama got it legalized across the nation. So, do you support the marriage of men, women, or penguins of the same sex?

Question 14

"Just because I fell asleep, doesn't mean I didn't like it." What comes to your mind?

Think of this as an ink blot test. People in both Scranton and Pawnee definitely saw the darndest things. If it isn't April or Andy saying something weird, it's probably Kevin or Michael talking about sheer nonsense. So, what does this phrase bring to your mind?

Question 15

Where would you rather drink?

You need somewhere in your town to drink for after work functions. If you become friends with your co-workers, which in Pawnee and Scranton, you definitely will, then you’ll want somewhere to go with them to get a few drinks after work. Which of these two establishments would you rather drink at?

Question 16

Which historical thing would you rather visit?

Would you rather visit Turnbill Mansion, the site of the wedding of a Pawnee Native American man and white woman, which became a bloodbath when word got out about the wedding and only two horses survived, or Gettysburg, a Civil War battleground where Abraham Lincoln famously addressed his valiant soldiers?

Question 17

Where would you rather see sexy women?

If you were going to visit an establishment where you could see some sexy women, you could either go to Hooters, where you can see big-breasted waitresses being objectified AND enjoy some top class hot wings, or you can go to The Glitter Factory, a strip club that Tom enjoys with an all you can eat breakfast that Ron enjoys. Which will it be?

Question 18

Are you team Pam or team Karen?

Okay, so it might be tempting to imagine that Karen was so devastated by getting dumped by Jim that she literally changed her name, moved away, and started a new life as a nurse, but even Jim isn't that good. Still, which of these girls next door is more your thing?

Question 19

Do you like handcrafted wood works?

You might be a hipster following Joan Callamezzo and her clique of Twitterati who appreciate the retro-ness of handcrafted chairs, or you might just appreciate fine craftsmanship, but if you like handcrafted wood works, then Pawnee is the place for you, because you’ll have Ron Swanson and his hands on your doorstep.

Question 20

Would you be interested in vacationing on Schrute Farms?

Schrute Farms is first and foremost the farm and residence of Dwight and Mose Schrute, but it's also a bed and breakfast. Dwight is being killed by reviews on TripAdvisor, but you can count on a good one from Pam Beesly to vouch for the funness of a vacation there. So, would you at all be interested in taking a vacation on the farm?

Question 21

Which of these is scarier?

There's a lot of good people to be found in both Pawnee and Scranton. Good, honest people who lead wayward lives. However, there are also a number of shady individuals. These individuals might put you off choosing to live somewhere. So, which of these two people puts you off moving to their city more?

Question 22

Are you urban or suburban?

Scranton is the sixth most populous city in Pennsylvania – the same state that contains heavyweight cities like Pittsburgh and Philadelphia – while Pawnee’s population dropped by about 13,000 between the 2000 and 2010 census. So, would you rather live in a town with a large or small population? Which of these numbers is more agreeable to you?

Question 23

Is good quality paper important to you?

If you're a writer or a calligrapher or an artist or a scrapbooker or simply someone who sends a lot of faxes or prints a lot of forms, then perhaps the paper industry is important to you, and you need to have paper that is a high quality for your daily doings. So, is this something that applies to you or not?

Question 24

Who would you rather have representing you in government?

If you could choose your government representative – well, actually, you can, in a way, because of the democratic voting process, but if it was you and you alone – which of these two guys would you choose? The salacious Senator who does well with the gay latino population or the guy from the Parks Department who means well but gets no respect?

Question 25

What kind of radio do you listen to?

Dwight seems to enjoy country music, as he has the country music radio station Froggy 101's bumper sticker on his desk. So, you can either listen to Froggy 101 in Scranton, or you can listen to the shock jocks' morning zoo radio show Crazy Ira and The Douche in Pawnee. The Douche's real name is Howard Tuttleman. So, which style of radio do you prefer?

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