Can You Match The Picture To The Decepticon

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The newest Transformers movie, Transformers: The Last Knight, opened in theaters worldwide just about a month ago. It's the fifth movie in this franchise, meaning the days of the ever-weird Shia Lebeouf and the ever- hot Megan Fox are now long gone- personally I don't miss Shia at all but Megan's a different story. Anyway, the newest movie actually had the lowest opening of any installment in the franchise and has only made about $130 million in the states since its release. On the other hand it has made almost $500 million in the rest of the world so it's pretty clear the Transformers are still both kick-ass and immensely popular.

Of course, any franchise worth its salt has to have a bunch of bad guys to keep the whole thing going and Transformers is no exception. Since the beginning our favorite Autobots like Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, and Ratchet have had to face the sinister forces of the Decepticons, led by that nasty evil genius Megatron. There are more Decepticons than you can shake a giant robotic fist at and they are all pretty bad.

But how well do you know which one of these guys is which? Sure, we know they all have red eyes (well, mostly) and wear their purple "insignia" proudly, but can you tell the difference between Megatron and  Starscream? Or how about Bonecrusher and Onslaught? Especially when they are in vehicle form??? Let's give it a shot. Just remember, we are only looking at Decepticons from the current film franchise and it's related video games.

Question 1

Which Decepticon Is It?

I'll start us off with a super easy one just to get everybody in the proper mood. I'm pretty sure that if you don't get both this one and the next one you might want to head on over to a "Which Muppet Am I?" quiz or something similar. So anyway...this guy is the original baddie Decepticon, the first "Fallen Prime." He's also the mentor 'Bot to some other pretty important bad guys. His only goal in life was to get the Matrix of Leadership. And really, isn't that all any of us aspire to?

Question 2

Which Decepticon Is It?

The second and most famous bad dude in the franchise is not only totally evil and probably totally insane but also the brother of Optimus Prime and apprentice to the original bad guy- talk about family dynamics! He's also super into the Allspark, even though good old Sam Witwicky actually kills him with it. But, as with most 'Bots, he was revived for future films and came back bigger, better, and badder than ever. That is, until his bro Optimus took off his head with an axe.

Question 3

Which Decepticon Is It?

This baddie has got a pretty odd thing going on. He's one of the Decepticon "scientists" so you'd think he would be a little more refined but he's actually a Cybertronian SPG. That stands for Self-Propelled Gun, for all you non-military buffs out there, and it essentially means that he's just one big rolling cannon. That seems an odd choice for a bot of intelligence but hey, I didn't write the movies. He was killed in the Battle of Chicago by Optimus Prime, who appears to have been pretty busy that day.

Question 4

Which Decepticon Is It?

This one is supposed to be the "pet" of another Decepticon, although I'm not sure he knows that himself. He certainly can do quite a bit of damage all on his lonesome, way more than your average dog left alone in the house. He sort of takes the form of a giant worm or dragon and his favorite move is to wrap his "coils" around a building and squeeze. Here's a shocker about his fate- he was killed in the Battle of Chicago by a certain good guy with a lot of robot sludge on his hands.

Question 5

Which Decepticon Is It?

This particular bad guy is the second-in-command of Megatron and is really, really into air power. Which I suppose makes sense as his vehicular form is that of a Lockheed Martin F-22 Raptor, the most kick ass fighter plane in the actual U.S. Air Force's arsenal. In fact, I wouldn't mind transforming into one of those myself- those things are frigging fast! But I digress. This Decepticon is the head of Megatron's air force and sometimes clashes with his boss over his role and responsibility.

Question 6

Which Decepticon Is It?

OK, so this is definitely one 'Bot you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley. No that he would fit down said alley. This guy is huge, as he is the parent 'Bot to a bunch of other nasty, smaller Decepticons. He would easily stand 100 feet tall- that is, if his incredible mass and weight allowed him to actually walk upright. It doesn't so he has to settle for being about 50 feet tall and walking on his hands like some giant ape.

Question 7

Which Decepticon Is It?

Here's a nasty piece of work that really likes to mix it up. And it's no wonder that he does, as his vehicular shape is that of the M1 Abram's Main Battle Tank. That tank just happens to be the most advanced tank in the U.S. army and the world. He's a total badass who had a huge fight with ratchet in Mission City and was then finally killed by Bumblebee. Hey, at least it wasn't Optimus Prime who got him.

Question 8

Which Decepticon Is It?

Every bad guy needs loyal and competent lieutenants to make his scheme of world domination fly and Megatron is no different than the rest. Fortunately for him and unfortunately for humanity, he has a very capable communications officer who is really good at C4i. If you're not in the military yourself that acronym stands for "Command, Control, Communication, Computers and Intelligence." This 'Bot is pretty effective in that role, as proven by his stealthy sabotage of human military satellites. He also transforms into a silver Mercedes which is pretty darn cool in its own right.

Question 9

Which Decepticon Is It?

This Decepticon was actually the first one to ever appear onscreen in a Trasnsormers movie. That makes sense, I guess, as he is considered a "first-strike" 'Bot. He first appears attacking a military base (and decimating it in the process) as a MH-53J Pave Low III helicopter, whatever the hell that is. Like all the other Decepticons out there he's obsessed with getting his hands (gauntlets? pincers?) on the Allspark, so much so that he goes to Mission City to steal it and meets his doom at the hands of human fighter jets.

Question 10

Which Decepticon Is It?

Every evil empire needs some stealthy grunt-work guys and this Decepticon is no slouch when it comes to creeping around and generally causing mayhem. He's actually in the form of a wicked cool jaguar which sports only one eye. I don't know about you but if a metal jaguar with one glowing red eye showed up at my door I would give him whatever he wanted. Unless I were Bumblebee, in which case I would just rip out his spine, which is what ultimately happens to this 'Bot.

Question 11

Which Decepticon Is It?

Some guys are just cranky and I guess that extends to robotic Decepticons as well as humans. Take this one, for example, who spends most of his time in a foul mood looking for a rumble. He's certainly built to take and receive punishment as his vehicular form is that of a military anti-mine armored truck. In fact, he almost looks like the proverbial "Brick Sh*thouse" although in metal form. He likes to fight down and dirty but, like so many of his brethren, end up having his head chopped off by Optimus outside Mission City.

Question 12

Which Decepticon Is It?

Remember that last Decepticon who transformed into a helicopter? Remember how much damage he did? While this guy is modeled on the same basic design and might be even worse. His helicopter design is that of the CH-53E Super Stallion, which is actually the largest helicopter in the real world and is used by the U.S. Marines. In the movies he's much more interested in using the weight of his chopper to knock people around in close combat. That is, until the original O.P. has a go at his face.

Question 13

Which Decepticon Is It?

This Decepticon is part of the Constructicon sub-set of vehicles and is one of the smaller (but still huge) 'Bots who can disengage from that hulking parent machine I mentioned back in entry number six. His particular trick is to turn himself into a giant two-wheeled fighter. He can cruise around on both treads or actually lift up onto one wheel with the other one balanced behind his head. He fought Optimus Prime but amazingly didn't have his head ripped off. instead Optimus shot him in the head...

Question 14

Which Decepticon Is It?

Another thing that an evil organization wants is secret surveillance experts. That where this guy comes in. He's a master at hiding and observing in secret. Well, most of the time, that is. It probably doesn't hurt that his vehicle form is a cool Audi sports car. In any case, he hid out in China for a long time until he made the fatal mistake of getting caught by the Autobots. Needless to say he didn't last long after that and Sideswipe takes him down. What a waste of an Audi!

Question 15

Which Decepticon Is It?

Not every Decepticon is from another world. Unfortunately, some of them were commissioned and constructed right here on Earth. I'm talking, of course, about the KSI Drones, who were supposed to be "good" robots in the mold of the Autobots. That didn't work out quite as planned once Megatron figured out what was going on. This dude is one of the corrupted ones. He was actually modeled after Optimus Prime so he looks like a big-ass tractor trailer truck when he's not 'botting around. He also took over all of the other KSI Drones for his own evil army.

Question 16

Which Decepticon Is It?

We go back to the Constructicons for this guy. He might actually be my favorite because, really, every evil army needs a dump truck for the fight. That's what this Decepticon is in his vehicular form and I for one think it's pretty cool. Unfortunately for both he and I (I need a sad Fanboy song inserted here) he had most of his body blown apart during the Egypt battle and ended up as basically a giant, disembodied robotic head.

Question 17

Which Decepticon Is It?

This particular baddie is one that uses his deception (well, he is a "Decepticon" after all!) and scouting abilities to get around. He is actually a police car 'Bot and causes some damage in the first flick before everybody realizes he is not a good guy. If you want proof that he's not the nicest check out the brass knuckles he wears in robot form- they say "Punish" and "Enslave" on them. I think I'll pass on that, thank you very much.

Question 18

Which Decepticon Is It?

There's also always a need for foot soldiers and grunt work when you're trying to take over the world and this Decepticon fits that particular bill perfectly. He's not particularly bright nor fast but he does plod along absorbing punishment. Which I think he should for having so little imagination that he transforms into a tow truck. Seriously? A tow truck?!!? That is not the coolest Transformer ever- sorry. Anyway, he's loyal to Megatron and gives a pretty good accounting of himself until Drift (not Optimus Prime!) beheads him.

Question 19

Which Decepticon Is It?

One of the cooler aspects of the Transformers world is when either Autobots or Decepticons transform into animal-types. This bad guy is definitely one of the coolest, as he transforms into a robotic condor. Condors are cool and it's the perfect type for a 'Bot that mostly functions as a scout and surveillance expert. He can actually also turn into a desktop computer and other small, electronic devices which is pretty useful too for a spy. He couldn't fool Bumblebee though, who took him out in the Battle of Chicago.

Question 20

Which Decepticon Is It?

So if one guy can transform into a computer why shouldn't another Decepticon transform into a boombox or even a cell phone. That's what this naughty robotic dude does. That also, unfortunately for him, means that he's not really that big so when he attacks Sam in the first movie Mikaela pretty easily cuts him in half with a power saw- ouch! He does get a second chance, due to the ever-present AllSpark, but screws that up as well when he attacks a bunch of human techies in a confined space and slices his own head off. Hey, at least Optimus didn't do it for him...

Question 21

Which Decepticon Is It?

You gotta have a concrete truck in your bad guys ranks, right? I mean after all, those trucks literally weigh tons and the idea of somebody dumping a bunch of fresh concrete on you during a battle seems less than appealing. That's why this Decepticon is so cool. Well, that and the fact that he can also do a "second" transformation into a an artillery piece or gun emplacment. It's good to have a bit of variety in your arsenal, after all.

Question 22

Which Decepticon Is It?

Somebody needs to help repair all of the other Decepticons after a long day of trying to enslave humanity and destroy the Autobots. that's where this little, spidery bad dude comes in. He is quite good at his job for a small guy- he helped revive Megatron, after all. Another cool aspect of this 'Bot is that he pops out of the chest of a larger 'Bot, ready to go. A not so cool feature of his is his attempt to extract information from Sam by opening up his brain. I guess we all have our little foibles.

Question 23

Which Decepticon Is It?

How about a Decepticon robot who doesn't look anything like a robot at all? Or a vehicle? Or a fortress? How about one that looks like a hot human chick? Enter this fine 'Bot, whose appearance is based on the sort of "girl next door," college coed thing so many guys go for. It seemed to work on Sam, who was totally ready to share everything with her before Mikaela offed her. Way to go Mikaela! Robots with "organic outer shells" are just creepy.

Question 24

Which Decepticon Is It?

Here's another 'Bot who only has one eye. I don't know why they always do that with these guys but it certainly makes me uncomfortable every time. I guess I just answered my own question... Anyway, this particular baddie "transforms" from a swarm of micro-cons and is so thin and two-dimensional that he is nearly invisible to all but the most astute observers. Needless to say he is not a Decepticon built for battle but one for spying and the like.

Question 25

Which Decepticon Is It?

Our final evil robots are some of the scariest, simply because you might never know they were there until it was too late. That's because they travel in packs disguised as Chevy Suburban emergency vehicles. You know, the big black Suburbans that the FBI, ATF, Secret Service, and other federal agencies always seem to have tons of lying around. Even worse, when they transform into their "real" Decepticon form, they are pretty freaking scary to look at and may just remind you of the bad guys in a whole other franchise.. That's all I'm gonna say about that, however.

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