If You Fail This Quiz, You've Clearly Never Had A BF
- by Ricky Bambuto
- – on
- in Lifestyle
Life isn't all about relationships, but it sure is a lot about it. Being as we are social animals, we all need each other to survive, even if we think we don't. That's not to say that we don't enjoy time to ourselves. We need that, too. But, too much isolation without good companionship to balance it out can get boring after a while.
Thankfully, humans do this great thing where they pair up and spend a lot of time with each other. This cuts the boredom and, if it's really working out, can even introduce this thing called love, which is a great feeling that some say affirms life itself.
Depending on where you're at, you might never have experienced this elusive love thing. If that's the case, you can look forward to experiencing it for the very first time one day. Maybe your first love is far behind you, or maybe it's unfolding right now. So many possibilities, so little room to list them here.
In any case, since you've come to visit our little quiz, let's have some fun. We've put these questions together so we can guess your relationship history (or lack thereof). If you fail this quiz, you've clearly never had a boyfriend.
Are you an introvert?
Let's start this off with a little assessment of your personality type. Unfortunately, we can't perform a deep analysis right now, so we'll stick to the fundamentals. Tell us - do you consider yourself more of an introvert or an extrovert?
Do you have lots of hobbies?
Since there's only so much time in a day, people who aren't in relationships typically use their free time to explore hobbies more than those in a couple. If you have about ten dedicated hobbies that you maintain, you're probably not balancing that with a boyfriend. Or are you?
How picky are you?
Statistically speaking, the pickier you are, the less likely you are to find someone that you like enough to stick around. When you evaluate a potential BF, do you several pages of bullet points you need to check off before going on a date? Or do you prefer improvising?
Do you like trying new things?
To those who've never had a BF before, diving into a relationship for the first time can be scary. It requires a leap of faith, one that those opposed to trying new things aren't always ready to take. If you're the adventurous type, you've probably had at least one relationship.
Do you ever feel like you're invisible?
Sometimes, you might feel like people look right through you. As if you were made of air instead of skin and bone. Of course, no one's really invisible, but it's easy to feel that way. If you do, you might be lacking the motivation needed to pursue a relationship.
Are you often the 3rd wheel?
Being the third wheel isn't so bad if the other two wheels enjoy you being around. In any other case, it's a little awkward. If you find yourself acting as a third wheel more often than not, you might otherwise be spending time with a BF.
Do you have trust issues?
Trusting other people is hard. In a perfect world, we'd have access to all thoughts in each other's minds, all the time, but it's not a perfect world. In this world, you need to open yourself up to being hurt if you're looking to spend time around people.
Does flirting seem like a foreign language to you?
When you flirt, do you feel as though you're trying to speak some foreign dialect that you haven't studied? Does the person you're flirting with even know what you're doing? Flirting can help you get a BF, if you didn't already know.
Do you have a lot of friends?
Let's approach things statistically once again: if you have lots of friends, you have lots of bridges to potential new friends, which includes potential new boyfriends. If you only have two friends, that's only two bridges. Do you have lots of friends?
Do you prefer dressing comfortably or like a Kardashian?
Some men like women who dress up like Kardashians, others prefer women who go out in pants that are a hemming away from pajamas. But, if you'd look at the amount of boyfriends Kardashian girls tend to have, it's likely higher than those of the pajama clan.
Is there a little voice telling you to run away when guys approach you?
That little voice is known as Resistance, and it'll mess with you if you try anything at all that's worth your time. Live beyond that voice, and you can do anything. Or, you can listen to what it's telling you, and run away. Running is great for cardio.
Are you very worried about having your heart broken?
Everyone's at least a little worried abut having their heart broken, even if they don't admit it. Lending your heart to someone is hard enough, but receiving it back with a crack calls for ice cream. Are you only a little worried about having your heart broken, or a lot.
Have you started to dread family gatherings?
If you've never had a BF before, you know full well the awkwardness of being asked by family members, over and over again, whether you have a BF. Even if you say "No" loudly enough for everyone to hear, it seems like everyone gets their turn eventually.
Do/did you go to an all-girls high school?
Back to reliable old statistics once more: if you went/go to an all-girls school, you had/have a drastically reduced chance of meeting a BF, at least at school. And, considering school is where you were/are most of the time, that counts for something.
Does it seem like every guy you like already has a girlfriend?
If it does, that's pretty frustrating. It's understandable that men out there have girlfriends. That's fine, we're not complaining about that. But why does it have to be every compatible zodiac sign? Do the gods of Olympus have no mercy?
Do you live in the internet?
We all visit the internet from time to time, at our own paces. It's a second home, in a way. Some of us (increasingly more of us, maybe) are starting to spend more time in the internet than out of it. If that's you, then remember that the boyfriends are outside the internet.
How needy are you?
All guys have their own acceptable neediness ratio. If he likes you enough to put up with your neediness, he'll stick around. If you're too needy given the amount he likes you, you'll be looking at his untied shoelaces as he walks away, wondering if you should tell him.
Do guys scare you?
Guys can be scary. Historically speaking, guys have done some bad stuff, oh boy. But a lot of them have done some good, too. If your first instinct when meeting a guy is to fear him, your potential relationship quickly loses its potential.
Do you say everything that's on your mind?
Being vocal about your every thought is a hit or miss kind of thing when you're looking for a BF. Some guys, if they prefer listening, like it when you're talkative. Other guys would rather the silence, or the sound of 20 motorcycles speeding by.
Do you care what people think of you?
A handsome new guy you meet, AKA a potential boyfriend, will think things about you, and you won't know what those things are. This is out of your control. Thankfully, you're much more in control of how effective you allow others' opinions of you to be.
Do you have strict parents?
Strict parents barely let you do anything. They wake you up with cymbals at the crack of dawn, and wait in dual armchairs for you to get home from school so they can chain you to the table for homework time. Of course, strict parents don't like boyfriends, either.
Are you only attracted to guys who aren't attracted to you?
It's typical to go for something that seems just out of reach. This applies to objects and concepts as much as it does people. If a guy plays hard to get, it's normal to want to chase after him all the more. But, if you're only attracted to guys who aren't attracted to you, that's something else.
Are you old fashioned?
Back in the day, there was a fashion that was relevant given the time it was conceived in. These days, we call that the "old fashion" or "old school". Everyone's a mix of both, but you can tell which way a person leans just by talking to them. Are you old fashioned?
How do you treat guys?
If you treat guys like they're people you care about, they're more likely to gravitate toward you. If you treat them like they're some cardboard box in human form that you don't quite understand, they won't be sticking around. This applies to females too, by the way.
Do you prefer nights out or nights in?
Nights in are great. You can eat delicious snacks and watch something, or work on a passion project, or sleep. One thing you can't do, though, is get a boyfriend. To do that, you usually need to go out. So which of these nights do you prefer?
Would you say you're approachable?
If you're approachable, guess what? People will approach you. Even better, one of these people could be your next BF! On the other hand, if you have a resting angry jellybean face, guys would probably rather go get a hot dog or something than talk to you.
Do you believe that true love waits?
True love probably does wait, at least for a while. Since we're living in a universe running on linear time, true love can't help but wait in line with everything else that happens. But, if the eventuality of true love is your hourly mantra, you might not notice the cool guy standing right there.
Are you self-conscious?
If you're a self-conscious person, you might be too bothered of what a guy could be thinking about you to open yourself up to him. We need self-consciousness to function, but too much of it can leave you paralyzed. Are you paralyzed by self-consciousness?
Do you play sports?
Sports are great, depending on who you're asking. Some people make a secondary lifestyle out of their interest in sports, joining fantasy leagues and playing with friends during all their free time. Others, when asked, couldn't care less about anything sports-related.
Do your friends push you toward every handsome guy you meet?
Your friends, if their good friends, will want to see you happy. In wanting that, and noticing that you've never had a boyfriend, they might set a side journey for themselves to hook you up with every potential suitor you meet. This could be good, or it could be embarrassing.
What do you do most often in your spare time?
We're assuming that the person taking this quiz is not Elon Musk, and that you do have some form of spare time in your days. So, tell us how you usually spend it. Do you do social stuff or do you practice things like the cyr wheel at home? Or, are you Elon Musk?
What did you do last Valentine's Day?
Let's remember February 14, 2017. The weather was behaving as it normally does in your region in mid-February, or it was weird that day, Chances are, you were out on a date or at home watching a rom com. Tell us, and we'll see if you've ever had a BF.
Do your friends have busy love lives you can't relate to?
It's one thing to never have had a BF before, but it's considerably worse if all your friends seem to be going into relationships left and right. If you're single, it's cool to have other single people around to spend some idle hours with.
Do/did you like high school?
High school - the best, right? A lot of things happen in this crazy jungle they call an institution of education. High schoolers learn more in the hallways than in classes. Also, many girlfriends have met their boyfriends during a locket chat in a hallway.
Do you want to have a boyfriend?
After all this, one thing has now dawned on us. Maybe you don't even want to have a boyfriend. Maybe you don't now, never did and never will. In that case, give us a last answer in this for-fun quiz, and we'll tell you if you've ever had a boyfriend anyway.
