9 In 10 Men Will Fail This Test About Women. Can You Pass It?

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Ah, women. One of the world’s greatest mysteries. For the other half of the planet, they continue to keep men intrigued with their intuition and mystical ways. Women were created to bear the fruit of the Earth. They grow new human beings. How dope is that? They nurture the human race. They make everything more beautiful. She feels like home. How do they do that?

Maybe we really are from two different planets. It’s more likely that we are just two very different forms of the same species. The yin and the yang, women and men aren’t as opposite as many men believe. Truthfully, women seem to learn the ropes of how men operate pretty damn well. It’s the males who have trouble understanding what their ladies are up to and why.

What’s the big deal with shoes anyway? Why does she cry about everything? How can the most complex and difficult decision land on her plate and she pulls the trigger and makes a choice almost immediate? What is that magic? Let’s not forget that women manage to push babies out of their bodies! It’s mystifying to even the most gynocentric man. Just how well do you know the women in your life? Think you’ve got it figure out? Test your knowledge!

Question 1

Why do women always go to the bathroom together?

It doesn't seem to matter where you go together. You can go alone as a couple, but if you bump into friends, the ladies will inevitably head off to the bathroom together at some point. If you head out with other couples, the same end result happens. One woman has to use the restroom, they all have to. What gives? Short of having someone in the stall next to you that you trust to hand you clean toilet paper, why do women always rush off to the loo in a group?

Question 2

Why doesn't she want sex in the morning?

Sure, some women are all about the mid-morning romp, but most of them just aren't feeling it — like ever. Remember those early days of your relationship when she wanted it all the time? What happened? A demanding career, money woes, children, hormones and more can impact a woman's sex drive. Remember fellas, sex starts outside of the bedroom. Still, if she gets enough sleep and her alarm hasn't even gone off yet, why is she pushing you away every morning?

Question 3

How long is the average woman’s menstrual cycle?

We know... every man's favorite topic. Maybe it's time to reframe the focus around women's bodies. You do love our bodies, right? Our cycle makes us who we are. It's the reason we thought you were hot and not your buddy standing next to you. It's the reason our hair is so soft, we don't have hairy backs, and we love sex so much when we're ovulating. So hey, maybe it's not such a bad thing? Any idea how long the average cycle is?

Question 4

Why do women share their problems with their men?

We're all human and we've all got problems. Sometimes, we need to talk about those problems in order to flesh them out and see what we need to do next. It's helpful to share our feelings with someone else. But women and men may share their problems for different reasons. So, take a wild guess. When a woman comes home from a long day at work and she's bitching about her boss and the impending project that they just threw at her, why is she sharing this with you?

Question 5

Why do chicks cry so damn much?

She cried the first time you hurt her feelings when you had only been dating for a month. She cried when she saw Titanic for the 156th time. She couldn't believe Jack died. She cried when April and Jackson lost their baby on Grey's, and continues to tear up every time she purposely rewatches that episode. She cries when she doesn't get her way sometimes, too. She cried when you proposed. She cries when other people have babies. Seriously, ladies, what's with all the tears?

Question 6

Why do we get so bitchy when it’s that time of the month?

You've been encouraged not to trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. Women are notorious for setting traps. We know how to bait a man and get him to walk right into the lion's den before we bite his head off. This type of behavior often ramps up in the last week of our cycles when we're gearing up to have our period. Yes, we just used that dirty work. Any idea why our mood plummets at the same time every month?

Question 7

Why is she pissed that you liked another woman’s picture on Facebook?

You were just minding your own business, scrolling on Facebook. A friend's picture popped up and you 'liked' it. There was no exchange of words. You haven't even talked to that friend in at least a year. Your woman goes bat shit crazy when she sees it and asks if you're cheating, or maybe you just wish you were cheating. What gives? That friend you haven't talked to in a year... was a girl. What is up with women these days? Why can't you simply acknowledge another woman's existence without encountering WWIII?

Question 8

What are you supposed to say when she asks if another girl is hot?

So you're out on the town with your girl. It's a regular Saturday night. You haven't argued. You had a good meal. You met up with friends for drinks (which may have precipitated what comes next). Out of nowhere, she blindsides you and asks if the girl standing at the bar is "hot or not" in your opinion. Panic sets in. What are you supposed to say? The longer you hesitate, the more she seems to be screening your eyes for signs that you're a big, fat liar. What do you do?

Question 9

Do women want you to have a lot of experience in bed before they meet you?

Most of the time, men are hell bent on making sure they sound well experienced. This is especially true in the locker room. Just like women are always competing with their looks. Men like to compete with one another with the prowess. They all want to be top dog, the king of the alpha males. Calm your horses — ahem, hormones — there for just one second, stallion. Have you ever paused to consider whether all that talk with your boys might actually harm your rep? Do women really want a guy who's been around the block?

Question 10

Why do women always ask what's on a man's mind?

You're minding your own business playing your video games or watching Sports Center. The house is quiet. Even years into marriage, a quiet man someone seems to beckon a woman to fill that silence with questions. They're never-ending. "What's on your mind," she mutters? You reply, "nothing." She doesn't believe you. Women must think that men don't say what they mean, either. Why are they always asking what you're thinking about? Why can't they accept that sometimes you aren't thinking about jack shit?

Question 11

What’s with the drawn on eyebrows? (all the makeup)

FFS! Stop the madness! Men aren't completely oblivious to social trends. They see with each passing decade that there are new trends arising, and women usually buy right into those corporate-created trends and gobble them up. Acid washed jeans that came up to the navel never really looked good before, and it doesn't now. But those eyebrows, ladies! Why are women everywhere drawing their eyebrows on? Some of them are shaving their real eyebrows off and replacing them with crazy ones that don't match! WTF?

Question 12

When is it considered acceptable to cat-call a woman?

Men can be pretty shameless sometimes. Most of them will admit it. They don't see the harm in yelling at a beautiful woman across the street and telling her she's sexy. In fact, they would freaking love it if a woman did that to them. It would go down in history as one of the best things that's ever happened to them, and they'd tell everyone they know all about it. Do women really hate it? Is there ever a time they're cool with it?

Question 13

Why do women wear revealing clothing?

There certainly are a wild variety of clothing options for women nowadays. They can wear men's clothing and still look hot. They can dress like they're Amish for all men care and there will still be an adult film made out of it. Most women are dress a little less risque than they were in the nineties. Sex appeal isn't directly equated to how much skin is showing anymore. That being said, plenty of women are still flaunting it all as much as they can. Why?

Question 14

What do we think about the neighbor and his six-pack abs?

Reminder: women are not the same visual characters that men are. Still, that doesn't mean we can't enjoy a little eye candy now and then. But what exactly makes us tick? Are we turned on at the very sign of a ripped swimmer's bod or do we require more than that to wet our tastebuds? While men are very simple creatures who like to look, and look, and look some more... women want to connect on other levels and looks alone won't cut it. So, what do we really think about the neighbor and his six-pack abs?

Question 15

How important is money to the average woman?

Who doesn't love money? While it may be the root of all evil, it's also the root of bliss and a good starting point for a far less stressful life. Women are born to be caretakers. While many of us love the career fight and our jobs, we are biologically wired to try to do it all. Even women without children will push themselves to handle more than they reasonably can. It's the curse of having a uterus. Thus, sometimes we rely on the man to be the breadwinner. Of course, some women are just gold diggers, right?

Question 16

When does “I’m fine” really mean “I’m fine”?

This single question may be the entire reason you decided to take this quiz. No man would ever say he's fine when he's not, right? What's the point in that? Women seem to love to blur the lines of communication and make life harder than it needs to be, right? You've been dying to know ever since your ex bit your head off for believing her when she uttered those two words... does "I'm fine" really mean "I'm fine"? In your world, it does.

Question 17

Which personality type really makes for the best time in the sack?

Women come in all shapes and sizes, but the variety doesn't stop there. Their personalities are as diverse as their waistlines and cup sizes. While men might be scanning all of those superficial features on the surface, they aren't always drawn to the Jenna Jameson lookalike. Ever wonder why your bros seem to fall so easily for all the Snooki's out there? Hello, personality! Rumor has it the craziest girls made the wildest lovers. Is there any truth to this long-held myth? Which personality type is really proven to rock your world?

Question 18

Are we really incapable of accepting compliments?

There's not much a woman can't do. We birth babies. We take care of households full of children and whining men without batting an eye. We work. We clean. We make sure everyone's laundry is done before we fall asleep. We never let you go hungry. And we do all of this while looking damn good, too. So, why in the hell can women not accomplish the small feat of accepting a compliment? Is it really impossible for them to do?

Question 19

What secret source or pain relief helps women get through childbirth?

We like to think of men and women as equal most of the time, but the truth is, we are very different beings. We also like to think of men as the tough ones and women as weak, but both physical endurance and emotional welfare across both genders tell a different story. Women appear to be far more resilient than males, and can we have a moment of silence to recognize that women everywhere have been birthing human beings since existence and men have never once overcome that level of pain? What naturally helps women get through it?

Question 20

Do you really want to know about our exes?

You're chilling with your girl and everything is bliss. Suddenly, a random girl on the TV reminds her of an outfit your ex once wore in a picture she saw of the two of you together six years before she ever met you. Now she's on a tirade wondering what you ever saw in that woman and is asking for all the gory details of everything from how you met, to how soon you had sex, to when you knew it was over and who called it all off. Does she really want to know about your Gwen Stefani?

Question 21

Don't all women secretly love drama?

She swears she hates drama. She wants nothing to do with your sister's man woes or your mom's attitude about how she plans to raise your kids. But every time they come for her, she sure does dish it right back. Alright, maybe she's just standing up for herself. But what about the hours of indulging in the Real Housewives of every major city in the world? What about her diehard affection for her college roommate who still can't keep a man because she's so busy getting into bar fights and losing every job she ever got?

Question 22

How do women really feel about your mom?

You might be wondering by now how we really feel about your mother. She's your mom. You've loved her for your entire life. In your eyes, she pretty much can't do anything wrong. We enter the picture timidly. We have to bite our tongues in the beginning. We are new. She's been around and already has your heart. We don't want to lose you because we don't jive with your momma. So, we play nice. Then you fall in love with us and the claws come out. WTF? How so women really feel about your mom?

Question 23

Why do women ask about a man's plans for the future? We rarely think about anything beyond today.

Men are creatures of habit. They spend most of their time thinking about repeating what they did yesterday. Whoever's playing in today's game might be different than yesterday's, but it's still football. That's all the degree of change they require. On the other hand, women are thinking about marriage and babies before they even meet the right guy. Sometimes, they're so bent on the end goal that they force the wrong guy into it with them first. Can we say "foul ball?" Why does she ask you about your outlook on the future when she knows you're not entertaining it?

Question 24

Are all women hypocrites?

Life with a woman can often seem unfair. She can go out for drinks with the girls every Wednesday night, but you're expected to be home on the weekends. Hittin' the clubs with your homeboys isn't gonna fly. One time, you asked about this double standard, and the explanation was so long that you stopped caring and shrank back down into the role of the dutiful partner you're supposed to be fulfilling. A man isn’t “allowed” to do X, Y and Z, but the woman can still do it, and she’s not a hypocrite?

Question 25

Why can’t women ever make up their mind about where to eat?

Ah, every man has been there. It's nearing dinner time. She seems heavily entrenched in whatever project she's currently working on. Maybe the kids have worn her out all day. Perhaps she just needs time to get lost in that novel. Hey, her boss might have thrown a ton of work her way and she's scrambling to get it done before the weekend. A supportive man totally understands his lady can't get dinner on the table every night, but why is it so damn hard to admit that and pick somewhere else to get it from?

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